IDIOTS IN SERVICE:

This week, our phones went
dead and I had to contact the telephone repair
people. They promised to be out between 8:00 a.m.
and 7:00 p.m. When I asked if they could give me a
smaller time window, the pleasant gentleman
asked,  Would you like us to call you before we
come? I  replied that I didn't see how he would be
able to do   that since our phones weren't working.
He also requested that we report future outages by
email.  (Does YOUR email work without a telephone
line?).
 

IDIOTS AT WORK:

I was signing the receipt for my credit card
purchase when the clerk noticed
I had never signed my name on the back of the
credit card. She informed me that she could not
complete the transaction unless the card was signed.
When I asked why, she explained that it was
necessary to compare the signature I had just
signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in
front of her. She carefully compared the signature
to the one I had just signed on the receipt. As luck
would have it, they matched.
 

IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD:

I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new
neighbor call the local township administr! ative
office to request the removal of the Deer Cros sing
sign on our road. The reason: too many deer were
being hit by cars and she didn't want them to cross
there anymore. I could swear I've recently been
with some of these people...
 

IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE:

My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered
a taco. She asked the person behind the counter
for minimal lettuce. He said he was sorry, but
they only have iceberg.
 

IDIOT SIGHTING #1

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when
an airport employee asked, Has anyone put
anything in your baggage without your knowledge?
To which I replied, If it was without my knowledge,
how w! ould I know? She smiled knowingly and
nodded, That's why we ask.
 

IDIOT SIGHTING #2
 

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to
cross the street. I was crossing with a coworker of
mine when she asked if I knew what the buzzer
was for. I explained that it signals blind people
when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, What on earth are blind
people doing driving?
 

IDIOT SIGHTING #3

At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear
coworker who is leaving the
company due to downsizing, our manager
commented cheerfully, This is fun. We
should do this more often. Not a word was spoken.
! ; We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-
the-headlights stare.
 

IDIOT SIGHTING #4

I work with an individual who plugged her power
strip back into itself and for the life of her couldn't
understand why her system would not turn on.

IDIOT SIGHTING #5

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile
dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys
had been locked in it. We went to the service
department and found a mechanic working
feverishly to unlock the driver's
side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
instinctively tried the door handle and discovered
that it was unlocked. Hey, I announced to the
technician, it's open! To which he replied, I know I
! already got that side.
 

Now don't you feel better?